An Australian Lament

I love this bonzer country,
This land of grog and honey.
Of wallaby and cockatoo,
Of shearing shed and dunny.

Of mates like Blue and Ocker,
Of Pharlap and the Don
The kingdom of the knocker,
The wowser and the con.

I love our bonzer scenery,
Where the mighty gum trees soar,
And our never ending deserts,
And the plains of Nullabor.

And I love our terrific culture,
Like Jason and Kylie.
But nothing beats Thursday night,
And SEX with Sophie Lee.

I love this bonzer country,
Where the sea is full of sharks,
With blowies big as eagles,
Where the Dingos howl and bark.

Where your team gets trounced each Saturday,
Where your pub runs out of beer,
You go out and party with your mates
And chunder without fear.

Then thereís recreations;
like tossing cans at the umpire,
And brawling with the other team
And setting bins on fire.

We all go to the races
Or to the T.A.B.
Thereís pokies at the R.S.L.
And sessions by the sea.

I love this bonzer country,
With its FJ utes and cars.
With xxxx beer and meat pies,
And late night cocktail bars.

Where the roads are full of potholes,
And Police with radar traps.
Where all the land and businesses
Are owned by Yanks or Japs.

Hey, when you come to think of it,
Itís not so really great,
On second thoughts, Iím jack of it,
I think Iíll emigrate !

......................Anon......................

Submitted by John Chandler

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